La Corda D'Oro: ABRIDGED!
by Sooah
Summary: A ton of fancy words are used, the competitors play pop music, and the fourth wall is repeatedly broken. This can only mean one thing; La Corda D'Oro has been ABRIDGED! (Rated T because I'm paranoid and for Len's censored mouth.)


So, I finally got my first fanfic uploaded! Yay! I am super excited about this fanfic since La Corda is my favourite anime, and I hope you all like it too. Before we begin the story, here's a brief word from Azuma:

**Azuma: Sooah does not own me, La Corda D'oro, Technicolor, or anything else other than the words. This is a parody and is in no way meant to be offensive. *Does an epic hair flip*  
**

Thank you very much, Azuma! Now, please enjoy La Corda D'Oro: ABRIDGED! ~Sooah~

* * *

1: An Overly Long Prelude

Our story begins in the somewhat distant past…which was a Wednesday. There was once a guy who wanted to become a famous musician. The only problem was that he kind of sucked at music.

One day, when he was feeling sad about not being able to play music, he met a creepy glowing creature. The creature noticed that he was depressed and gave him some advice.

"Those who can't do it, teach it! Just open a music school!"

_Hmmm…_the man thought. _That's not a bad idea…_

"No, no, no, no, no!" Kahoko Hino ran awkwardly to school, late as usual with her red hair flying behind her.

"Who builds a school with so many stairs?!"

Kahoko ran into Seiso Academy's empty school yard-courtyard-thing. She stopped at the statue of a disco-dancing fairy; the school's mascot. She tried to catch her breath, feeling like she was about to have a heart attack.

"Man, I need to invest in an alarm clock."

"How come no one on this side of the fourth wall sees me?!" Another voice yelled.

"What the heck?" Kahoko looked up to see a weird glowing…thingy. "AAAAAAAHHHHH! GHOST!"

"Awesome!" The glowing thing said as she ran away. "Let's make these bells ring for no apparent reason!"

Right on cue, some bells started ringing on the other end of the campus.

"Hey, dude, the carillon is ringing!" One of the insignificant students said to his friend.

"What the heck is a carillon?"

"I think it's some fancy word for bells," a girl in their class said, joining them. "Everything in this anime has to have some fancy name. I think the ringing has some symbolic meaning."

"Really? What is it?" The first boy asked.

"Heck if I know."

Meanwhile, Kahoko ran into her classroom, partly out of fear of the ghost and partly because she was still late. Even though she was late though, she would still have time for her friend Mio's monologue.

"Kaho!" None other than Mio came over and grabbed Kahoko's arm. "Did you hear the carillon ringing earlier?"

The redhead was shoved down into her seat. "What the heck is a carillon?"

"It's a fancy word for bells." Nao, Kahoko's other friend, explained from behind her.

"Nao, you're ruining my monologue!"

"Sorry, Mio."

"Anyway, yeah, I think I heard those ridiculously LOUD bells." Kahoko desperately wanted to move the conversation forward.

"Well," Mio continued, "It means that we're going to have a school-wide musical concours!"

"What the heck is a concours?" Kahoko was getting more and more confused by the minute.

Nao tapped her shoulder. "It's a fancy word for competition."

"Ohhhh…wait, but why say it's a school-wide music competition if only music students can compete since they actually play instruments?"

Mio shrugged and took her seat. "Who knows? Maybe a magical fourth wall fairy will give you a violin that anyone can play so that you can be in the competition!"

_Fourth wall fairy? _Kahoko thought about the glowing thing she had seen earlier.

"Teacher alert!" Nao hissed.

The teacher they students had fondly nicknamed ManFace walked in.

In class, Kahoko couldn't concentrate. She kept think about everything that had happened that morning.

_Ghost?_

"Kahoko…"

_Fairy?_

"Kahoko!"

_Fourth wall?_

"KAHOKO!"

"It wasn't me, I swear!" Kahoko exclaimed, standing up. When she opened her eyes, she realized that everyone was staring at her and laughing. "Ohhh…"

ManFace facepalmed. "Kahoko, see me after class.

**One hour later…**

"Man, I can't believe ManFace just used me to do her dirty work for her. I think I'd rather have detention."

Kahoko was carrying a huge stack of books and papers to the Music Department. It was allegedly punishment for not paying attention in class, but in reality ManFace just didn't want to walk all the way to the music building.

Kahoko felt something shove her shoulder. She lost her balance, dropping all of ManFace's papers and books. The stairs below opened up their jaws, ready for a midday snack.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" Kahoko screamed at the top of her lungs.

"Mwahahahahaha!" The villainous stairs chuckled.

The fall never came though. Instead, a strong arm that could have been a bodybuilder's wrapped itself around Kahoko, saving her.

"Darn you!" The stairs complained.

Kahoko turned around once the arm righted her and let her go. It belonged to a boy with green hair who was a lot taller than her and really buff.

"Sorry about almost pushing you down the stairs." His voice was really deep.

"I could have died!" Kahoko crossed her arms. "You should at least help me pick up all this crap and take it to the Music Department."

"…fine…"

After they collect all of the books and papers, the two started towards the music Department. Neither one said anything to each other. Needless to say, it was really awkward.

"So…I'm Kahoko Hino."

"I'm Ryoutaro Tsuchiura."

Back to awkward silence.

**More awkward silence and an encounter from a not-yet-important character later…**

As Kahoko went to rejoin Mio and Nao for lunch, the loudspeaker went off.

"WHY HELLO EVERYONE!"

"GAH!" Caught by surprise, Kahoko slammed into the door of the classroom. It took all of her strength to ignore her ringing ears and sit down with her friends.

"In case you didn't know," the loudspeaker spoke again in a more reasonable volume, "The bells earlier mean that we are going to have a music competition! The competitors will now be announced.

First up, we have Azuma Yunoki!"

The purple-haired third year was outside, surrounded by fangirls.

"Congratulations, Azuma!"

"Wow, that's great!"

"Do your best, Azuma!"

The boy raised an eyebrow. "Do you honestly think that I wouldn't do my best?"

The fangirls went quiet. "Wait…what?"

Azuma's smile returned. "I mean…thank you all!"

"AZUMA!"

The announcement continued. "Next is Kazuki Hihara!"

"You did it, Kazuki!"

"Do good, okay?"

"Uhm…guys," Kazuki choked out from the grasp of his fellow third years. "Could…you…*cough*…let me go?"

"NOPE!"

"Our third competitor Is Len Tsukimori!"

"Wow…good job, Len!"

"Congratulations!"

The irritable, blue-haired boy looked back at the girls. "Don't congratulate me, *bleep*. I haven't won yet."

"Then we have Keiichi Shimizu!"

"Yo, Keiichi! Wake up!"

"Dude!"

The blonde raised his head slightly, still half asleep. "Huh…"

"They chose you for the –"

The unnamed student was cut off by Keiichi's head hitting the table.

No-name sighed. "-competition."

Keiichi began snoring.

"Next is Shoko Fuyuumi!"

"Congratulations, Shoko!"

The tiny girl had turned white and was shaking badly. Her pink eyes looked like they were going to pop out of her head.

"Shoko, are you okay? You don't look so hot."

With that comment, Shoko promptly got up, ran to the corner, and puked.

"And last but not least, Kahoko Hino!"

Kahoko nearly swallowed her straw. "WHAT?! I don't even play an instrument!"

"If you have any questions, comment, or concerns, please go see Hiroto Kanazawa in the Music Department." With that, the announcement ended.

Kahoko stood up and marched out of the room.

"Where are you going?!" Mio shouted. Kahoko was already gone, so she turned to Nao. "Where's she going?"

Nao shrugged. "Clubbing?"

Kahoko opened the door, slamming it into the wall. "Kanazawa, why in the name of ever-loving crackers am I in the music competition?! I can't even play an instrument!"

Kanazawa sighed, annoyed that the announcement had told everyone to come and see him with their problems. He turned to face the redheaded Gen-Ed student.

"That sounds like a personal problem to me. By the way, you're supposed to go see the fourth wall fairy in one of the practice rooms."

"Say what?"

The lavender-haired man sighed again. "The glowing thing?"

"You can see it too?!"

"Heck no! Can you get out of my office?!"

After being kicked out by Kanazawa, Kahoko decided to go and meet this fourth wall fairy. After all, she didn't have anything better to do since she had kind of forgotten about class. On the way there she passed two music students with Technicolor hair. She figured that they were fellow competitors whose five second introductions had been abridged out.

All of the practice rooms were full, except for one.

"Well, I guess this is it."

Kahoko stepped into the practice room. The wooden colors made her crave chocolate. However, chocolate soon became the furthest thing from her mind as a glowing creature appeared.

"GAH! What the heck are you?!"

The blonde creature grinned. "I'm Lili. I'm a fourth wall fairy!"

"Fourth wall fairy?"

Yep! We connect this side of the fourth wall with the other side.

Before, everyone could see us, no matter which side of the fourth wall they were on. But lately only people on the opposite side can. Which is why you're special!"

Lili flew up way too close to Kahoko's face. "You can see me, even though you're on this side of the fourth wall! With your help, we can reconnect both sides of the fourth wall! That's why you were chosen for the competition!"

"BUT I CAN'T PLAY ANY INSTRUMENTS!"

"Don't worry," Lili said as soon as he had recovered from Kahoko's screaming. "I'll give you this!"

With a wave of his wand, a wink of his eye, and a glimmer in his nose, a bunch of sparkles went flying. They settled near Kahoko. When they disappeared, a violin was cradled in her hands.

"It's a magic violin," Lili explained. "Anyone can play it!"

"But what if something goes wrong?"

"What could possibly go wrong?"

"Um…" Kahoko thought for a moment. "What if I become obsessed with being perfect and force the violin to be better and better and in the process break three of the strings at the same time causing all the magic to spill out and turning the violin into a regular violin?"

Lili seemed thoughtful. "Nah, that'll never happen! Here's a case and a bow! I leave it to you, Kahoko!"

"But I don't-"

Lili was already gone, leaving Kahoko with a case, a bow, and an allegedly magical violin.

"Man, this sucks!" Kahoko said to herself as she left. A boy with blue hair gave her a dirty look as he passed. Yet another yet-to-be-important character that had gotten his scene abridged out.

"Having a first year compete? And you're not even, like, good? What a loser."

Kahoko looked up, her heroine sense tingling.

Three older music students were bullying another, younger student.

"Not knowing your role is dangerous."

"Almost as dangerous as you Princess Tutu reference?" Kahoko stepped up behind the girl she would later come to know as Shoko.

"Oh, look what the cat dragged in. A regular student."

"Regular is right. Regular looking!" Another one of the trio said, inciting laughter.

"And this one is a dishonor on the Music Department. Dishonor on her and her cow!" The trio laughed again.

"Alright, that's it!" Kahoko stepped forward. "Just because you guys weren't chosen doesn't give you the right to intimidate people by throwing references around!"

"Well, if you're so wonderful, why don't you play a piece for us on your violin and prove that you belong in the competition?"

_Oh crap! _Kahoko thought.

* * *

Questions? Comments? Concerns? Please leave a review!

This chapter was brought to you by procrastination in schoolwork.

In case you didn't notice, pretty much everyone side from Kanazawa will be referred to by their first name to make things easier.

I'm trying to decide on pop songs to play in place of each classical piece, particularly 'Ave Maria'. If you have an idea for a piece you'd like to see in the abridged series, please tell me! It doesn't have to be just pop either...any song is up for election.

Also, this episode was really hard to abridge because practically everything is important. Not to mention the fact that because I'm abridging this as a story and not just a video, I still have to describe everything. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it and come back for more!

~Sooah~


End file.
